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Vicki Bentley

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The pursuit of perfection

Posted on March 11, 2017 by bentley.vicki

IMG_1104Two weeks after my daughter’s second birthday and the lingering signs of celebration are still evident. Half deflated balloons are still scattered around the playroom, birthday cards are still on display. We’re still slowly but surely chipping away at some of the leftover (non perishable!) food from her birthday party. It was a great day, full of good company, food, toddler meltdowns and lots of memories. But if I’m being honest…there may have been a teeny sigh of relief when it was all over. Celebrating can take a lot of effort!

I wonder why that is? Why we can’t just let go and enjoy the celebration without making everything so complicated? To quote an article a friend posted recently, we should be aiming for “Happiness over Perfection.” Three little words but oh so powerful.  For so many of us the opposite holds true. Sometimes it’s so easy to get caught up in all the details, trying to make everything oh so pinterest-worthy and perfect that we forget to actually enjoy the celebration in the first place. Or even worse, prevent the celebration from even taking place? How many times have I held back from inviting someone over  because I didn’t feel my house was organized enough or up to scratch? I have stressed over parties, worried that my hosting skills would be inadequate somehow, that people wouldn’t have a good time, if the food would be well received. I have friends who seem like natural hostesses and yet I’m sure the same thoughts run through their heads too- at least it would make me feel better if they did!

It doesn’t just stop there though. As women, we compare our homes, our children, our finances, our lifestyles to those around us, forgetting that only the very best version of ourselves is ever presented on social media. We pursue worldly standards of success and attainment, often unrealistic and unreachable, that only serve to make us feel inadequate at the end of the day.  We want our lives to be, or at least appear to be, perfect. And somewhere along the way – that quest for perfection robs us of our joy, stopping us from enjoying what we do have and celebrating the moment.

God does not expect perfection from us. He knows us. He knows we will never measure up. So he gave us a Savior, who was and is perfect on our behalf. This perfection that we are pursuing, often distracts and diverts our focus from God, instead of resting in His grace and His mercy, and pursuing His calling on our life. We need to listen to God when He tells us to pursue His ways rather than the ways of the world (Romans 12:2). That He is enough (Philippians 4:19). That we do not require anyone else’s approval for we are a child of God, set apart and dearly loved.

My daughter still greets her Peppa Pig birthday balloons with joy when she sees them in the morning. She still pores over her birthday cards, meticulously looking at each picture and having us read them aloud. She asks us to sing the happy birthday song over and over and wants to look again and again at videos and pictures of her party. Her little heart is still being sustained by the joy of the event.In the same way sometimes we need a celebration to break through the monotony of life or the hardships we are going through. A celebration, whether it’s a gathering with friends, a special night out, even a playdate, can sustain us and be a joy giver when we need it the most.

So what’s stopping you from unleashing that joy? What standards of perfection are you trying to pursue? Let’s take a breath this morning and give ourselves a break.

In God’s eyes, we are enough. Stop the striving and just rest in his presence today.

Welcome!

Hi, i'm Vicki—a writer, editor, and general word girl, sharing my musings on this little corner of the internet. I'm also a wife, mom, and daughter of the King—that's Jesus by the way—and my deepest desire is to create a space here that's encouraging, joyful, hope-filled, and most of all, authentic.

I'd love for you to stay a while, have a look around, and hopefully come back and visit from time to time. And I'd especially love to hear from you, so please do get in touch—I'm only a click away.

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